Showing posts with label Seagate Light. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Seagate Light. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

The Seagate Light #2


THE SEAGATE LIGHT  


Our Spectacular 2nd Issue

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Note From John the Cafeteria worker                                                                                         
Stop throwing your freaking food inmates! I am not your slave.  I work hard on your food.  It is not my fault that the budget for your food is so low.  Write to your politicians and families and ask for higher quality food I would be all to happy to cook it.

Seagate Going Ons (What we like to call news)                                                                         
Trevor Slattery - There is still no word on Trevor Slattery. Please contact the Warden immediately if you have information regarding his disappearance.

The cafeteria is excited to announce that we will have Mystery Meal Fridays, ....one more reason to say TGIF!

Guards are watching the battles between the Rivals and the Chessmen.  Both groups will be separated, no acts of aggression will be tolerated.

Dr. Noah Burnstein now has one volunteer.  However, others will be accepted.  So if you don't mind growing three eyes or a tail please contact him.  Seagate will  not be held liable for any damages to your person from the Burnstein's experiments.

Quote                                                                                                                                              
Todays Quote came for our favorite fighter Man Mountain Marko

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter.
Ernest Hemingway

Ok so that is disturbing but thanks anyway Mr Marko.

Poem                                                                                                            
Today's poem comes from me myself and I, the one and only Shades!  I often think about what I will think about the outside world once I get out of this place.  There were many things in my past life I took for granted and I often wonder how I will see those things now, after being a prisoner.  So I have selected a section of the works of the poet T.S. Eliot.  Enjoy.



We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
Through the unknown, remembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was the beginning;
At the source of the longest river
The voice of the hidden waterfall
And the children in the apple-tree
Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half heard, in the stillness
Between the two waves of the sea.
Quick now, here, now, always--
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of things shall be well
When the tongues of flame are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one.

Little Gidding V,
Four Quartets.
-- T.S. Eliot (1943)



Meet your fellow Inmates                                                                                                                      

Name:  Michael Marko
From:  New York City
Favorite Music:  Rocky Soundtrack - Eye of the Tiger
Favorite Movie:  The Godfather or Rocky
Favorite Book: Dirty Magazines
Favorite Food and Why: Pasta, Canoles, Italian food because it reminds me of home and my mom.
Least Favorite Food and Why: Seagate's food, because its inedible trash

Here are your winning Jailbird Bingo Numbers

 

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Can you solve the Seagate files?  

JQ

Thursday, September 18, 2014

The Seagate Light #1 - Seagate's Official Newsletter


THE SEAGATE LIGHT  


http://i.huffpost.com/gen/1497866/thumbs/o-JAIL-CELL-facebook.jpg
Seagate Cribs check out the cells of your neighbors
THE AMAZING FIRST ISSUE!

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Note From Warden Tyler                                                                                                             
I have allowed the use of Prison resources and time on the creation of this newsletter in the hopes that it will provide some of you with skills that you can use outside of these hallowed walls.  The newsletter is a privilege and I will be watching both the newsletter and its effect on our population closely.  Any signs of incitement and the newsletter privilege will be revoked.  Use this resource wisely, carry on.

Seagate Going Ons (What we like to call news)                                                                         
Trevor Slattery - While filming a documentary the inmate Trevor Slattery disappeared.  Please contact the Warden immediately if you have information regarding his disappearance.

The cafeteria is excited to announce that Sloppy Joes will be returning to Fridays, as well as Taco Tuesday next month.

The ongoing vandalism in the Bathroom stalls with etchings like "Whirlwinds rule" "Rivals are King" and "Chessmen Forever" will not be tolerated.  The situation is being monitored by the guards.

Dr. Noah Burnstein is a scientist requesting volunteers to undergo a experimental medical testing.  Prisoner will receive a letter of recommendation from the warden as well as a reduced sentence.  Only you can know if the risk of growing extra eyeballs, and glowing skin are worth it.  Neither Seagate nor Dr. Burnstein will be held liable for side effects of the experimental procedures.


Poetry                                                                                                                                              
The poetry selection was made by inmate Trevor Slattery prior to his sudden disappearance.  We felt with his enlightened Shakespearean background he could select an entertaining piece.  He selected the poem Ozymandias on the fall of Kings and Empires by Percy Shelley. Enjoy:

 
Ozymandias
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away


Meet your fellow Inmates                                                                                                                      

Name:  Carl Lucas
From:  New York City - Harlem
Favorite Music:  Anything by Tupac
Favorite Movie:  Kill Bill - A story of revenge, I can relate.
Favorite Book:  Count of Mont Cristo
Favorite Food and Why:  Fried Chicken because it tastes great and goes with anything.
Least Favorite Food and Why:  Fish because it smells like Fish.  Plus they look funny.

Here are your winning Jailbird Bingo Numbers



See more Newsletters
Can you solve the Seagate files?  

JQ